March 20, 2013
Have you thought about a birth mother support group?
Support groups. We’ve all seen the stereotypes on TV – bad coffee, even worse pastries, sitting in folding chairs in a school gym talking about your feelings. It sounds terrible right?
They’re not.
Support groups exist for a reason. The primary one being that every single day someone is put in a position where they are expected to deal with someone they never anticipated – something that has changed their lives and about which they may have few resources to truly handle on their own. Everyone deserves to be surrounded by love, support and guidance during these times – which is exactly what these groups are meant to offer. Deciding to place your child for adoption can be incredibly overwhelming, especially if you are not surrounded by enough support. If you are pregnant and thinking about adoption, you deserve to be near people who can help you through the process, provide you with the information you need to make fully informed decisions, to be there for you when you’re struggling, and, ultimately, to be your friend. Still unsure about finding a support group? Here are some reasons why a birth mother support group could be the right decision for you:
1. You will have the opportunity to be around people who understand what you’re going through. Not everyone understands adoption. And if you are considering placing your child for adoption, you need to be around people who can support that decision and share insight into what that journey is like. There is no better resource for this than women who have been through what you’re going through and have placed a child for adoption as well.
2. Everyone needs a safe space where they can be scared. Most likely, you are spending much of your day being very strong. You’re being brave for yourself, brave for your baby, brave in the face of any family or friends who may be doubting your decision. You deserve a safe space where you can ask questions, share fears and receive no judgment.
3. A support group can provide you with the resources and tools you need to move your adoption along. There are a billion agencies in the world and different laws for every state. If you’re still working to find an agency, a support group can help provide you with the resources you need to help move the process along and give you the information you need to begin your adoption journey.
4. Post-adoption support. Your adoption journey doesn’t necessarily end once your child is in the custody of its adoptive parents. This is a lifelong process of acceptance and understanding that you deserve to go through with people who have been down that road and can help guide you through time.
5. Eventually, you can be there for another birth mother. The most amazing thing about receiving help is gaining the strength to give it back. Once you feel confident and ready to move forward in your life, you are in a position where you can share your experience and provide support to another new birth mother. Your challenges and successes as you move along your journey are invaluable for other women deciding to place their child for adoption. And who knows how many lifelong friends you will meet along the way?
For more information about birth mother support groups in your state, check out Birth Mother Resources.