January 11, 2016
Small Gestures, Big Impact
Your kids are looking at every single thing you do. It may not feel like it (especially when they’re teenagers), but they are. Like little sponges, soaking up your mood, how you treat them and others, what you do, what you say — they internalize all of this, not only shaping who they are, but how they view you and the world. Seem like a heavy burden? It is! Parenting is not for the faint of heart. Thus, it is not the grand gestures that make the biggest impact on your child’s life. It is the smallest of actions, those that can be repeated and renewed day after day, creating patterns of care, love and support, that have the greatest impact on your child and your relationship with them.
Here are a few small gestures that give big love:
- Saying “I love you” every day. More than once! Saying it before bed, saying it in the morning, repeating it over and over and over. Kids need to hear this, and the more you say it, the more they learn to receive it and give it back to the world and themselves.
- Pass along a sweet note. Pop it in their lunchbox or backpack. Slip it into the pocket of a favorite pair of pants, alongside the bookmark in the book they’re reading, or in an instrument case on the way to rehearsal. This small, unexpected gesture will brighten their day and show them how much you’re thinking about them.
- Listen to what they say. Kids often think they’re not being heard, especially by adults. Take the time to really listen to what your child is saying by giving them your uninterrupted, completely focused attention.
- Make their favorite treat for dinner, or add a special dessert into their lunchbox. Surprise them with a meal at their favorite restaurant for lunch or dinner on the weekend. Food shows love and nurturing, and who doesn’t like to be treated with their favorite thing to eat?
- Create new traditions. Thursday game night, popcorn dinner Sundays, mani pedis, or an outdoor walk every Saturday morning. These rituals give the gift of time, as well as giving your child something to look forward to each week.
- Put the phone down. Your kid isn’t going to put their phone down if you can’t leave yours behind every once in a while. Cultivate your connection with your child, and teach them to stay connected to other people, by putting technology aside. Focus on them and the quality time you have together. It will mean worlds.
What are some fun, different ways in which you connect with and show love to your child?